Tag: ex-gay

June 24, 2013

hot topics

Alan Chambers of Exodus Int. – apologetic or confused and conflicted?

As a Christian blogger, Exodus International was one of the key links on my website directing people struggling with same-sex attraction attractions to visit for information on how to be healed from this type of sexual sin.  So with great interest I’ve been following all the controversy related to his “I’m Sorry” letter to the gay community and the eventual shutting down of the organization.  I’ve posted parts of it throughout this page but it can be seen here in its entirety as long as Exodus International keeps their site up.

I’ve had many mixed emotions upon hearing from Alan Chambers’ apologies and why he was shutting it down. And with his announcement that Exodus Int. is closing, it was promptly taken off my website. But maybe it should have been taken down long ago with reasons I’ll explain later.

Still believes that marriage should be between a man and a woman (or does he)

What is most troubling about his apologies are the scores of people who may be hurt even worse because of it. Much confusion from the gay community in that many believe Alan is actually apologizing for calling their sexual lives a sin. He did make it clear at the end of his apology that he is NOT apologizing for his stance on what he believes the bible teaches about marriage and clarified in an interview with The Christian Post:

CP: In your written apology that you posted online you said that you can’t apologize for your belief in biblical sexual boundaries, but you did say that you will “exercise my beliefs with great care and respect for those who do not share them.” So can you please describe what those biblical sexual boundaries are, and also how your approach to those who disagree with you has changed?

Chambers: My beliefs about sex and sexuality and sexual expression are that God created, His original created intent was sexual expression between one man and one woman for one lifetime in the bonds of marriage, and that is the truth I live by.

Warning! “The truth I live by”… so if someone else has another “truth” is he going to accept it – as truth? How will Alan be able to now minister to gays who are practicing the sin of homosexuality – does he still recognize it as sin and that is sin for all of mankind, not just for those who believe it is sin?

Confusing apologies and confusing stance on sexual orientation

So what is he apologizing for? A glimpse into answers to that question can be found here in an interview with CNN’s Anderson Cooper:

He apologizes for his and his leaders’ rhetoric that has caused hurt, anxiety, trauma and shame. How much of that is Exodus and how much is scripture isn’t made plain here.  Much talk about feeling bad that people are traumatized for being led to believe they can change and Alan says that they can’t. I take it that Alan is making the distinction between sexual orientation and sexual acts. He claims he still has same-sex attraction but loves his wife.  Very confusing stuff here but more on that later in the post.

Here are a few passages from his letter of apology that caught my attention:

“But if the Church is a body, with many members being connected to the whole, then I believe that what one of us does right we all do right, and what one of us does wrong we all do wrong. We have done wrong, and I stand with many others who now recognize the need to offer apologies and make things right.”

I disagree here with Alan that if one does right/wrong then we all do. No, Exodus International participated in some questionable practices that truly did hurt many people. If what Alan is saying here is that we are all one – then must all churches that teach against homosexuality be shut down as Exodus Int.? So no we are separate organizations in one family of believers and that’s what Alan probably meant. All believers don’t have to seek apologies for what Exodus International has been guilty of doing.

Many have been hurt by questionable practices (not just calling it sin)

Some more from Alan here:

“Please know that I am deeply sorry. I am sorry for the pain and hurt many of you have experienced.

Alan is not clear here on what ways the gay community has been hurt. Many are hurt just hearing that the bible says homosexuality is a sin. But there have been other ways they have been hurt such as calling them demon possessed, name calling – sodomites, unnecessary questions about their sex lives, (from the ex-gays who confronted Alan on Lisa Ling’s report on the Oprah Network):

I am sorry that some of you spent years working through the shame and guilt you felt when your attractions didn’t change. I am sorry we promoted sexual orientation change efforts and reparative theories about sexual orientation that stigmatized parents.

Alan Chambers used to teach that one’s sexual orientation could be changed. A stance that understandably confused Anderson Cooper in the video above when he asked Alan about not being able to change sexual orientation while married to a woman. Anderson asked Alan point blank was he gay which Alan never did offer an emphatic yes or no. Alan Chambers has done nothing more than create further confusion.

Alan is whitewashing sin

I believe that Alan is sincerely trying to right some of the true wrongs of Exodus International but he’s appearing to now be very timid when it comes to scripture and when it comes to sin. An example of this timidity is when he said the following in his letter of apology:

“Our beliefs do not center on “sin” because “sin” isn’t at the center of our faith.”

With statements like that then perhaps it is best that Exodus International shuts down. If one doesn’t understand that Christ is the center of our faith and that His dying on the cross was for our SINS which makes SIN very central to the Christian faith, then Exodus has lost it’s entire focus of our Lord. Alan is crucifying our Lord all over again!

Past hints that something was wrong

There were some hints from the past that all is not well with Alan. My first clue that something was amiss was when in January 2012, Alan was an unplanned guest on a panel at the Gay Christian Network Conference in Orlando, Florida.  This is a conference of gays who practice homosexuality with a few who were practicing celibacy. Alan addressed them as “brothers and sisters in Christ.” Those of us who believe God’s word that homosexuality is a sin, know that those who rebel against God and persist in sin are not recognized as Children of God. (See my post Can you be a Christian AND a homosexual?)

The second clue at the same conference is when he said 99.9% of the people he knew had not changed their sexual orientation. A major hint that perhaps Alan was becoming disillusioned at his whole work at Exodus.

Praying for Alan Chambers – and his wife!

It’s tough to call someone a brother when he doesn’t seem to understand Christ’s death on the cross and how sin IS in the center of one’s life when Christ is on the throne! And how can he be called a believer if now what he believes is just “his” truth? Does he even believe that homosexuality is a sin anymore? And if he does, does he love the sinner enough to tell them the truth? Or now is he bowing down to the god of this world and bought the lie that one can practice homosexuality because Jesus loves them just as they are without change? And what about his wife, is she in danger of losing her husband to his lust for other men? I am hoping and praying that Alan breaks out of this snare and make the necessary changes he needs to make without further diluting of God’s word. I can see a more compassionate godly organization that will be a home to those seeking a change. But the leader himself must be grounded and that’s what I’m praying for in Alan.

Thank God there are organizations that are already faithful and bold in proclaiming God’s word, and that don’t depend on psycho-therapeutic means of seeking change in people but only through the blood of Jesus Christ! (See a list of ex-gay advocates and organizations on my blog and some listed in the articles below – with more to come!)

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More articles on Alan Chambers’ Apology (articles will be updated as more come in)

Alan Chambers Follows Hypergrace Movement Back to Egypt – by Scott Lively on CharismaNews
After Exodus: Evangelicals React as Ex-Gay Ministry Starts Over – by Melissa Steffan on Christianity Today
6 Lessons From the Collapse of Exodus International – by Michael Brown on CharismaNews
Sorry Exodus, Homosexuals Can COMPLETELY Change – Stephen Bennett – Ex-gay and founder of SBM Worldwide, Inc.

September 29, 2011

letter

A letter to A’isha – a Gay “Christian”

A blogger/writer, John Shore, urged his readers to forward  his latest blog post titled: “Why should any of us choose to be a part of a group that condemns us.” I knew him from many of his postings on the Huffington Post as being a professing Christian who rebukes other Christians for daring to say that homosexuality is a sin.  His blog article begins with informing his readers that he’s heard from A’isha, a friend of his who is a lesbian and a professing Christian.  She lost her beloved girlfriend recently and was finding a way of dealing with the grief through writing. A’isha had written a piece she wanted John to post in which he did.

But he urged A’isha’s piece to be forwarded with a stern warning to:

anyone who continues to cling to the ignorant, toxic belief that being gay is a choice for which God condemns people. (And to the people who in God’s name are STILL condemning A’isha? Save your souls: stop using Jesus to justify your own fear and hatred).”

John’s ignoring of the biblical commandments regarding sexual immorality that include homosexuality and his support of it recalled the following scriptures to my mind in Romans 1:28-32 where not only did those who practice in sin deserve death but also those who APPROVE of those who do the sinful practices.  John is just as guilty as those who practice the actual sins because of his adamant approval of the gay lifestyle.  Although we deserve death for these practices, God in His grace has spared many of us from instant death sentences.

A’isha’s piece is heartfelt and she obviously is still grieving the death of her loved one.  I prayed before writing my response because condemnation was the last thing she needed right now, but I also felt that too many people were shielding her from the truth and as painful as truth may be, it had to be shared.  So I wrote a comment which unfortunately didn’t appear on John’s blog.  I found him on facebook and wanted to know if he was going to post it and he let me know he wouldn’t and his reason for rejecting it: “Because A’isha is my friend.”

So with that I decided to post my response to A’isha on my own blog here and hopefully not only will A’isha seek Christ for the changes needed in her life but others who are also going through what she’s going through. Hopefully she will discover who her TRUE friends are and run as fast as she can from her “deceitful enemies!”

To A’isha

A’isha, my condolences to you for your loss and I do respect your strength in your time of grief as well.  Your story was very touching and because I’m not a lesbian but a heterosexual female, I can’t begin to relate with your struggles and where you are now.

I guess with all of that said, I guess I’m one of those who John refers to as holding on to the “ignorant and toxic belief that being gay is a choice that God condemns people” for. Well sort of. I believe that homosexuality is a choice or a lifestyle that can be changed, but I where I slightly differ is the condemnation part.  Christ didn’t come to condemn anyone so neither should the rest of us.  Until we become saved in Christ, we are all already in a state of condemnation and should be quite patient with one another through all of our struggles. (John 3:17-18).

There is a Proverb that comes to mind when I read this blog and it is this one: “Proverbs 27:6 – Faithful are the wounds of a friend, But the kisses of an enemy are deceitful.”  People appear to be afraid to speak the truth here for fear of being labeled someone who judges or condemns.  But the truth of the matter is that if we truly care about people then we will share the truth with them no matter how painful it could be.

A’isha, the truth sometimes hurts but if the truth is accepted, the fruit it bears will be quite worth the pain. The truth I’m speaking here is how clear the bible is on homosexuality and any sexual immorality outside of what God has approved – sex between a married man and a woman.

I know you know the scriptures so I won’t rehash them here unless asked to but I do want to share the story of a woman who struggled like you and she succeeded in getting out of the lesbian lifestyle.  I hope you read this because only she can relate to what you had gone through.

Her name is Charlene Cothran, a lady I’ve never met but is featured  on my blog.  She doesn’t push anyone who doesn’t want to leave the gay lifestyle. If you believe that you are gay and it’s not a choice and not changeable, then don’t bother reading.  This is for anyone who believes that with Christ all things are possible and that changing from gay to straight isn’t excluded among these possibilities.

If you are struggling and do desire to change, then read on! http://www.venusmagazine.org/cover_story.html

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See also the videos on this blog where Charlene is being interviewed. Her testimony is in detail on Youtube as well!

 

March 2, 2009

A Lesbian's Deliverance from Homosexuality

Charlene Cothran was a lesbian activist for over 30 years before accepting Christ as her Lord and Savior.  She was the publisher of a 35,000 plus circulation magazine called Venus that targeted black gays and lesbians .  After her conversion that magazine transformed into a Christian periodical that targets the same group of people.  See her cover story from this magazine titled:  Redeemed! 10 Ways to Get Out of the Gay Life, If You Want Out

Charlene lost many of her advertisers when her magazine converted to Christian based content so do stop by and offer her some much deserved support either morally, financially or both!  Go to Evidence Ministries at http://www.venusmagazine.org/.

This first video is a condensed version of the two-part videos that follow it regarding her lifestyle and transformation into the vibrant witness of Jesus Christ that she is today. It is powerful as it describes her point of conviction and the years it took until she eventually quit fighting God and submitted completely to His will.

For the full transcript of this video go the Christian Broadcast Network’s (CBN) website. Click here.

More on Charlene Cothran (long version):

(more…)

September 16, 2008

What exactly is gay bashing?

I’ve seen that term thrown around a lot lately, especially with the upcoming Proposition 8, the California Marriage Protection Amendment readying for the vote in November. Pastor Miles McPherson of the Rock Church San Diego, who’s hosting a rally in October in support of Proposition 8, is one example of pastors who are an increasing target of gay activists.

I’ve been surfing the blogs and have found many verbal attacks against him and those of us who speak out against homosexuality. Some of the names being thrown out are “gay-basher-in-chief” (Pastor Miles), homophobes, gay-marriage killers, and a whole lot more.

But what exactly is gay bashing? When I first heard that word, my first thought is that gay people are being hit over the head, or attacked physically – period! But now that term has been used to described much more. When I see how its used against people such as Pastor Miles, and ex-gay men such as Pastor DL of the GCMwatch blog and James Hartline of the James Hartline report, gays are expressing a hatred of not only their messages but the individuals themselves – even as drastic as death threats! With Pastor Miles activism in preaching the biblical and societal importance of the family as man and woman, husband and wife and Pastor DL and James Hartline teaching the message that homosexuality isn’t permanent, it can be changed, it seems as though “heterophobia” is on the rise!

Christians such as myself who have taken the time to debate homosexuals will run across many who also hate the messages that are being shared straight from the scriptures. For that I am lableled a homophobic, gay bashing hater of homosexual people! Although I never use derogatory words in speaking to them, it is simply the message that earns me the title of “gay basher!”

I’d like to hear from some of you who claim that gays are being “bashed” by Christians such as myself and others who are active in sharing the gospel of Jesus Christ, and unabashedly shameless when saying to someone that their lifestyle or sexual orientation my be acceptable to the state of California, but it isn’t to God. Who dare to say that yes, homosexuality is immoral as says the scriptures. I’m always looking for ways to improve myself as well, so any suggestions as to make my speech more acceptable, I’d like to hear those too!

Gay bashing is a very important term, because if gay marriages are approved permanently, then it may come to the courts to decide that “gay bashing” is illegal and therefore punishable. If it’s okay for gays to be married, then it certainly has to be okay period! Which is why it’s so important for many of us to take the stand for marriage between men and women. It seems to be coming to that point with people being fired from jobs, suspended from schools, and etc for people merely expressing disagreement with the gay sexual orientation.

So, let’s break it down! What is gay bashing? What is acceptable and unacceptable speech in talking to, about or with gays? I’d like to hear from both viewpoints – heterosexual and homosexual.

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